Welcome to my guide to tantric and sensual massage practices. This article will guide you through these two different massage approaches so that you can make an informed choice about the type of experience you’d like to receive, or provide. Man on the Couch offers both tantric healing (also known as tantric massage therapy) and sensual massage (also known as erotic massage), as part of a unique portfolio of tantric treatments and training, which includes a range of sex–positive sensory experiences, holistic therapies and coaching.
What Is Tantric Massage Really About?
If you search for ‘tantric massage’ on Google you’ll find many pages of escorting services. However, this is far removed from the origin and purpose of real tantra.
Sex is only a small part of tantric practices, and in some traditions, not at all. It’s been an important, and mostly hidden, part of Indian spirituality for thousands of years, and practised through rituals, meditation, yoga asana, and in some traditions, sacred sexuality.
Fast forward to 2020, and tantra is now being offered as a professional holistic therapy that can support people with a range of issues around sex and intimacy. Common issues supported include premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunction, vaginismus, and sexual traumas.
Professionally trained practitioners can also teach clients how to cultivate and harness sexual energy or ‘prana‘, the powerful force that creates life, for health and wellbeing. Sexual energy has the potential to help heal illness and regenerate cells. Tantric practices can also bring a whole new vista of pleasure to the body, including full body orgasm, through a range of sensory experiences that can bring clients into deeper connection with their body.
Many tantric practitioners have additional professional training, for example, for supporting emotional and trauma release, or depression and anxiety. They will focus on physical and emotional blockages in the body, including the genital area. They may also be trained in specialist massage techniques for specific pelvic and urogenital conditions, or offer coaching support.
Your session may include therapeutic ‘yoni’ (vaginal) massage for women or a prostate massage for men with ‘lingam’ (penis) massage which teaches men how to separate orgasm and ejaculation for prolonged pleasure and increased vitality. Female ejaculation (also known as ‘Amrita’ release) may also be offered for therapeutic reasons. Tantric professionals offer a full consultation process, and abide by a Code of Ethical Practice.
Ultimately, tantric massage is a part of an ancient spiritual practice to help open the heart, and bring us into deeper connection with ourselves, our partners, and life as a whole. A tantric master once said, “When we can be intimate with ourselves, we can truly be intimate with others.”
What Is Sensual Erotic Massage?
Sensual or erotic massage is a widely available experience that’s focused purely on pleasure. It normally includes the whole body, and may end with a massage of the sexual organs. Some sessions include body-to-body massage and mutual touch.
Masseurs and masseuses offer different types of massage for you to enjoy, including Swedish, Deep Tissue, or Lomi Lomi, using warm oil.
After receiving a deeply enjoyable experience for the whole body, the masseur or masseuse may provide a sexual massage with orgasm. Erotic massage for men usually ends with ejaculation, commonly termed ‘hand relief’ or ‘happy ending’.
It’s a relaxing experience that allows sexual expression in a comfortable and safe environment. It can also be great for managing stress.
Sensual, erotic massage by definition does not include oral or penetrative sex.
Length of massage
Tantric massage sessions normally last between three and six hours. Sessions include time for consultation and a long sequence of bodywork to build trust and create a safe space for healing and exploration. The client may come for a series of appointments. Erotic massage sessions usually last between one or two hours, and can be a one-off experience, or regular appointments.
Booking an appointment
You can often book sensual massage services on the same day, including at night. Tantric massage is similar to other holistic therapies with appointments booked in advance, and you may be asked for a deposit.
Genuine tantric professionals will have trained at a specialist school to learn specialist bodywork practices and become tantric educators. Some practitioners have additional therapy training to support people with sexual and intimacy issues, including emotional/trauma release. You should check in advance to make sure that they are ‘trauma informed’. Many sensual, erotic massage practitioners have professional training in different massage techniques.
Intention of practitioner
Whilst sensual massage may include therapeutic elements for relaxation, the main focus is on giving pleasure to the client. Authentic tantric massage also includes pleasure; however, this is in the context of supporting clients with sexual and intimacy challenges, personal growth, and tantric education.
Sexual and intimacy issues
Issues supported by tantric healing therapists include, erectile dysfunction; premature ejaculation; vaginism; anorgasmia; emotional intimacy issues; body dysmorphia; past sexual, physical, and emotional abuse; prostatitis; sexuality and chronic conditions/illness, and pornography addiction. Sexual Massage often does not tackle any personal issues.
Expanding your sexuality
Both sensual and tantric massages offer the opportunity to expand the range of your sexual experience. Tantric massage sessions may additionally include homework between sessions, for example, exercises for strengthening the pelvic floor, separating orgasm and ejaculation for men, and conscious self-pleasure practices.
Sensual massage can include ejaculation for men as a part of the session. Ejaculation isn’t generally a part of authentic tantric massage, as the focus is often on learning how to separate orgasm and ejaculation for enhanced pleasure, vitality, and spiritual growth.
Mutual touch and clothing
Many sensual massage practitioners offer mutual touch and nudity. Tantric massage sessions generally don’t include mutual touch, unless it is for therapeutic reasons, as the focus is on clients coming into deeper connection with themselves. Most tantric healing therapists will be clothed during the session.
Code of Practice
Professional tantric healing practitioners are bound by a Code of Ethical Practice, which includes client confidentiality, non-discrimination, and promoting the best interest of clients at all times. Sensual massage providers will also practice client confidentiality and provide a safe and comfortable space for your experience.